I get everything you’re saying, but I’m sure you realize that poor people in general, both black and white, experience some of these things, too.

That doesn’t mean I think your points aren’t accurate, but white people, too, suffer the inequities handed out by privileged white men and women.

I’m sorry if you’re angry with white women (I am a white woman) for taking up the #MeToo movement, but I thought we were all in it together since women of all races and ethnicities have endured sexual assaults. I honestly didn’t know black women started it or felt this way about #MeToo. I don’t think the intent was to offend those who started the movement.

As for BlackLivesMatter, it wasn’t liberals like me who appropriated the slogan and made it AllLivesMatter. As far as I’m concerned, that was just a slap back from the rich white ruling class. I agree completely.

I do want you to know that most of us liberals are trying as hard as we can not to be racist. We are products of our ancestry and raising, too, just as you refer to the raising of black children. I try very hard to shed any racist thought patterns and avoid even the smallest subconscious actions that are rooted in racism.

Sometimes, though, I feel I can’t get break from very sensitive black people. I’m becoming afraid to speak openly to a black friend — afraid I’ll say the wrong thing in my clumsy attempts to be completely non-racist and not cause offense.

Do you think there is reverse racism? I feel that some black people are never going to forgive my whiteness, which I can’t help. I’m always afraid I’m going to do something wrong or say something wrong no matter what. But I’m trying as hard as I can, and I want you to know that, and know, too, that I’m not alone.

Race relations have come a long way in my lifetime and I see progress (or did until Trump made it ok to hate). We are evolving, all of us. We’re are a flawed species no matter the color of our skin. That’s no reason not to try and I hope you notice many of us are trying. I am trying.

My grandfather wouldn’t call a black man “mister” or address him as “sir”. My dad rejected that and respected all people, black and white. He learned much in his lifetime and knew the burden of guilt the most decent of us carry like DNA. I, too, have evolved and I’m far different than my grandfather and other ancestors. I only recently learned, to my great sadness, that one set of my ancestors had slaves. It causes me pain to know that and I, too, bear ancestral guilt for what my race did to yours.

We’re learning. We’re trying (most of us) but we’re not perfect and never will be. I’m heartsick and enraged that young black men are not safe on our streets from THE POLICE. I can’t imagine the terror I’d feel if my teenage grandson was running around black. I hurt to think of the fear and worry black mothers and fathers face because their sons may be killed for being black and doing something white boys routinely and matter-of-factly do without a second thought. We still have far to go. We have to find ways to make that horror stop — along with all the evil — including thought patterns and unconscious slights and offenses we sometimes are blind to.

We are trying. I am sorry we aren’t doing better, faster. Please don’t hate us all.

Former print journalist, former mayor, retired law enforcement officer. Writing about politics and government along with random personal essays.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store